Hinge Reveals the “Follow-Through Formula” for Landing Second Dates

New Hinge data shows nearly half (49%) of daters have held back from sending a follow-up message after a great first date because they were worried about coming on too strong. The Follow-Through Formula is a simple, research-backed way to help people follow up with confidence and get to the second date.

At Hinge, we know the hardest part of dating isn’t always the first date, it’s what comes after. What should you say? How soon is too soon to reach out? What if you seem too eager?

That pressure holds a lot of people back. In fact, new Hinge data shows that approximately half (49%) of daters have refrained from sending a message after a great first date because they were worried about coming on too strong.So we created the Follow-Through Formula, a new, research-backed method from Hinge’s team of behavioral experts to help people move confidently from the first date to the second.

The formula was also inspired by a growing conversation today across social media calling for the return of yearning—being open and honest about wanting someone. In fact, yearning grew 102% in search volume and 67% in social conversation over the past two years.* Across TikTok and Reddit, people are expressing a desire to return to less ambiguity. It’s a common dating dilemma: you think you should play it cool, while the other person is hoping you’ll show you care.

Social media adages like “if they wanted to, they would” have taught people to sit back and wait for a signal. But when no one follows up, great dates fade into missed connections, and the cycle continues.

Hinge’s Follow-Through Formula
Our new research into daters’ preferences around messages after a date found that clarity is more attractive than ambiguity. Here’s the formula we’ve created for a great follow-up message: 

The secret to getting to the second date = (Timing) + (Enthusiasm) + (Intent)

• Timing: 75% of Hinge daters expect a follow-up message either the same day or the next day.
• Enthusiasm: 44% of Hinge daters say the most attractive part of a follow-up message is expressing general enthusiasm or interest in the person.
• Intent: 47% of Hinge daters prefer their match express interest in meeting again, but it’s not necessary to lock in specific details like time or place.

Not sure what that looks like? Here’s an example of a great follow-through message:

“I really enjoyed spending time with you tonight. Would love to see you again if you’re feeling the same.”

While it might sound simple, that’s part of what makes it powerful. We wanted to offer a clear, approachable way to help daters follow through, because we know that even small gestures can feel surprisingly vulnerable.

Who Should Send the Text First?
From our research on Digital Body Language (DBL), we know that people rely on subtle, nonverbal cues to gauge interest, especially in early dating. Following up after a first date is one of the clearest signals you can send.
But our data shows that if you’re waiting for them to text first, chances are, they’re waiting too. Only 11% of daters say they want to be the one to send the first message.

So if you felt a connection, don’t overthink it. The boldest thing you can do isn’t wait, it’s follow through. The Follow-Through Formula is here to help daters stop holding back, show up with confidence, and make dating better for everyone.

Methodology: Research was conducted by Hinge Labs, a team of PhD researchers and behavioral scientists providing evidence-based dating insights. In April 2025, they surveyed over 3,000 global respondents, both LGBTQIA+ and heterosexual daters.

*Search and social volume insights provided using two-year trend data from Keywords Everywhere, a Google search volume analytics platform, and social listening platforms, Brandwatch and YouScan.