10 Lessons in Love from Hinge: How Daters Can Communicate Better in 2026

If there’s one thing daters agree on, it’s that a major key to love is communication. From the first message to addressing the hardest topics, the way we share, listen, and respond sets the tone for every relationship. This year, our research and real-life stories revealed not just what daters want, but why: communication is the throughline in every successful connection.

But communication isn’t a natural talent; it’s a learned behaviour. It takes practice, reflection, and the courage to keep showing up as we build closeness. “The more intentionally we speak and listen, the more space we create for real understanding,” says Hinge’s Love & Connection Expert, Moe Ari Brown, LMFT (he/they).

Heading into 2026, Hinge hopes to empower daters to strengthen their communication by demonstrating how subtle shifts can change the way we connect. Through our research, campaigns, and expert insights, we know that it’s not about saying the perfect thing; it’s about showing up with honesty, curiosity, and care.

The 10 lessons that follow show what great communication looks like in practice, and how it can bring you closer to the relationships you want.

Let Them Hear You
Sometimes words on a screen can only go so far. Moe Ari Brown explains on the Giving (un)bothered podcast that a voice carries energy, humour, and authenticity that text simply can’t capture.

Voice Prompts on Hinge profiles lets other daters hear your personality in seconds, and the results back it up: profiles with Voice Prompts are 32% more likely to lead to a date.

Additionally, you can keep that energy going once the chat starts. 35% of Gen Z daters say they want to receive more Voice Notes from the people they’re talking to. Let them hear you - send a Voice Note when it feels right. Your voice can bring tone, warmth, and humour, making a conversation come alive.
Tell Stories; Build Bridges
During our collaboration with renowned psychotherapist Esther Perel this past June, she shared how “stories are bridges for human connection.” When you invite your date to share a story, you discover not just their answer, but their world, their past, their values, and their connections.

Be curious. Ask questions that invite stories, not statements. Stories create context and emotion, helping daters move past small talk and feel more connected.
Choose Authenticity Over Perfection
From our 2025 LGBTQIA+ D.A.T.E. Report, we learned that many daters struggle with what Moe Ari Brown calls the “cringe factor”- overanalyzing every move until they freeze. Attraction might be instant, but connection only happens when you act. Stop drafting, stop editing, and just send the message. Authenticity beats perfection every time.
Focus Builds Connection
Too many chats at once can feel overwhelming, especially for neurodiverse daters. Moe Ari Brown shares on the ADHD Women’s Wellbeing podcast: “What’s overwhelming is when you have too many messages on any app, email, or whatever. It’s just too much. We’re really encouraging daters to focus on quality matches and quality connections, instead of a lot of people at once.” In other words, meaningful communication isn’t about how many people you talk to, but how present you can be with the right ones.
Prioritize Effort as the New Currency
72% of women across sexualities say they care more about a partner’s effort than their earnings, and effort speaks before you do. The way you plan, check in, and follow through tells someone how you feel long before you spell it out. As Hinge’s Lead Relationship Scientist, Logan Ury, explains, what it means to “provide” has shifted: it’s less about being a breadwinner and more about showing up with intention.

Choose a thoughtful date over an expensive one. When your actions and communication align, it builds trust and momentum.
Stop Waiting for Fireworks; Start Building the Conversation
Gen Z daters crave deeper emotional connection, yet many hesitate to start the conversations that create it. That hesitation often comes from the belief that chemistry should happen instantly, and Logan Ury challenges the myth of the ‘spark’ on the Khloé in Wonder Land podcast.

Instead of waiting for lightning, stay with the conversation long enough for something real to take shape. Most chemistry isn’t instant - it’s built.
Ask Better Questions
Gen Z daters tell us they want more curiosity. In fact, 85% of people are more likely to want a second date if they’re asked thoughtful questions, as found in our 2025 Gen Z D.A.T.E. Report. Curiosity doesn’t just make you interesting; it makes your date feel comfortable opening up more. As Hinge dater Mathew Matos says: “I love when people ask about my real interests - what makes me tick.”

Don’t just talk to the person, listen and engage with them. That’s what communication is about.
Be Vulnerable to Build Closeness
This year’s chapter of No Ordinary Love spotlights real Hinge couples navigating modern love with patience and openness. In Tony and Sam’s story (captured by William Rayfet Hunter), we see them serendipitously reconnecting on Hinge after briefly meeting years earlier, only to find themselves navigating a long-distance relationship. Sam shared with Tony: “If we’re going to make this work, we have to communicate. Separated by an entire country, all we have when we’re apart is our words, so we gotta use them.”

Their story is a reminder that vulnerability is what transforms communication into connection. Keep an open mind, and let yourself be seen.
Use AI to Support, Not Replace, Connection
As Hinge CEO and Founder, Justin McLeod explains on the Rapid Response podcast, “AI must stand behind us, not between us.” Communication in love will always be human, but technology can help guide daters toward deeper compatibility and reduce the friction in early conversations. Think of AI as your second opinion, not your substitute, in forming connections.
Master the Follow-Through Formula
Half of daters admit they’ve held back from sending a message after a great first date - worried it might seem too eager. But Hinge’s research shows that clarity is more attractive than ambiguity. The Follow-Through Formula is simple: Timing + Enthusiasm + Intent.

75% of daters expect a message the same day or the next, 44% find genuine enthusiasm most attractive, and 47% want to see interest in meeting again - no need to overplan it. What helps get to a second date? Don’t wait; just follow through.

In 2026, consistent, thoughtful communication will shape the quality of your dating life, helping you build trust, deepen connection, and move toward the relationships you want.

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